Lightning bugs buzzing 'round the piss elm tree
I'm a hundred miles form reality
Take a big drag-suck it all in
Blow it out the window, let it ride on the wind
I see indigo wheels of purple and blue
People on TV, look like me and you
There's spiders on the ceiling and buzzards on the wall
If I could find the telephone, I'd give you a call

(Chorus)
Smoking in bed, smoking in bed
It's bad for my body-good for my head
I like to lay around the house and smoke in bed

Have any y'all ever seen a mattress burn
While listening to the Byrds sing 'Turn, Turn, Turn"
I've seen it happen, I'm living proof
If you don't believe me look at the hole in my roof
Now I can lay around the here and look at the sky
And watch the fuzzy black dragons as they fly by
I think it's time to roll a bog ole fatty
And try to find the phone to call Miss Paisley Patty

(Repeat Chorus Twice)