Not My Own

Ab

[Verse 1]
Ab
   I've had enough I've had enough
Ab
   I've taken all this time in my head
Gb
   No further along, I can't resolve
E                                   Eb
   Stop wondering "why" it's such a silly question

[Verse 2]
Ab
   Pardon my misdirection
Ab
   I tend to deflect when I'm feeling threatened
  Gb
I know I'm just a bag of bones
         E              Eb
So then, why the ache inside?

[Chorus]
Ab
   My life is not my own
      Eb
or at least not what it seems
            Gb
The child before with brightest dreams
            Eb
Awoken to unflinching reality

      Ab
I can claim I have control
                    Eb
but the truth never listens to you or me
                Gb
The sooner that I am crushed by time
                 Eb
The sooner I can finally be set free

Can we be free?

Ab Ab Gb E Eb

[Verse 3]
Ab
   Remember Katie back in high school

   and the way she smiled and smelled when she flipped her hair
Ab
   Remember staring at the ceiling

   and the pit inside your stomach when you found out she doesn't care
Gb
  Remember listening to your best friend

tell her abuser that she will be alright?
E                                                   Eb
Remember feeling like a feeling maybe felt a little freeing,

 but forgot that you were dead inside

[Pre-Chorus]
Ab
   I've got perspective now

and the world isn't so small
           Gb
But this reality makes me just not want
E               Eb
want to live at all

[Chorus]
Ab
   My life is not my own
      Eb
or at least not what it seems
            Gb
The child before with brightest dreams
            Eb
Awoken to unflinching reality

      Ab
I can claim I have control
                    Eb
but the truth never listens to you or me
                Gb
The sooner that I am crushed by time
                 Eb
The sooner I can finally be set free

Can we be free?

[Bridge]
Db Db Cm Ab
Db Db Cm Ab

           Db
I'm at the ending, I see my family
              Cm             Ab
but we're not broken, we are mending
           Db
And all my loved ones, they are surrounding
           Cm               Ab
The fear inside my heart escaping
          Db
And suffering has lost its meaning
              Cm                 Ab
and grief and joy, they are both dancing
            Db
I hold them close and tell them "I'm sorry"
              Eb
and they just smile and say

You were never
Ab      Db
  alone

Eb       Ab     Db
You were never alone
                              Cm
This life is cruel, but has potential
                  Ab              Db
There's something greater than we know
                                 Cm
Why have meaning when there's no meaning
        Ab                  Db
The evolution of our understanding
                               Cm
Creating purpose where pain resided
            Ab                   Db
and telling ourselves that it's normal
                               Eb
If this is living then tell me what do I do now?

Ab
Do we all just carry on?
Ab                    Eb
Can we all just carry on?

[Chorus]
Ab
   My life is not my own
      Eb
or at least not what it seems
            Gb
The child before with brightest dreams
            Eb
Awoken to unflinching reality

      Ab
I can claim I have control
                    Eb
but the truth never listens to you or me
                Gb
The sooner that I am crushed by time
                 Eb
The sooner I can finally be set free

Ab
   My life is not my own
      Eb
or at least not what it seems
            Gb
The child before with brightest dreams
            Eb
Awoken to unflinching reality

      Ab
I can claim I have control
                    Eb
but the truth never listens to you or me
                Gb
The sooner that I am crushed by time
                 Eb
The sooner I can finally be set free

                Ab
Can we be free?