I guess I have to be a lady
Smiling and waving
Constantly obeying

I guess I need a prince
To come and save me
Even if I don't need saving

I guess I must sit on a throne I don't own
Raising the babies we made all alone
I guess as a lady, there's just some things I'll never know
But if I were a man
I'd go to Japan

Maybe swim in the Seine
And learn to speak French
I'd have the whole world in the palm of my hand
I'd finally do what I could, but I can't
If I were a man

Eloise, I must tell you something
Tell me
I've learned to know of a woman who's come to be with child
Is it a lady or a maid?
It's a maid
Oh, I didn't know any of your maids were married
She's not married
She's not married?
How does a woman come to be with child if she's not married?
I don't know
We need to find out, so it doesn't happen to us!

I guess I have to go to banquets
Banquets make me anxious
Acting rather shameless

I guess I need a gown
Down past my ankles
Doing up my hair in tangles

I guess I have to sit still and look pretty
Dance till I'm proper dizzy
Throw away the life that I've been missing

But if I were a man
I'd summer in Cannes
Maybe play in the sand
And wear my own pants
I'd have the whole world in the palm of my hand
I'd finally fly far away from the nest

If I were a man
There'll be no ladies and lords
Just the world to explore
And I don't care if it's all blood and gore

No extravagant balls or gentlemen calls
And I don't give a rat if he's handsome and tall
I don't want to settle and squawk
Or never leave unless for a delicate walk

Whoa, whoa, whoa
What if I, what if I want to fly?
'Cause if I were a man
I'd go to Bhutan
Maybe play in the sand
And learn to speak French

I'd have the whole world in the palm of my hand
I'd finally do what I could, but I can't
If I were a man
If I were a man

I'd have the whole world in the palm of my hand
I'd finally do what I could, but I can't
If I were a man